I can't believe that Maia is going on 5 months already! It's really been an amazing journey. Having her has also been just extremely therapeutic. Kissing her chubby cheeks...amazing!!! I have come to realize that mothers probably can understand God's love better than most people. There is no feeling like carrying a child for nine months. Feeling her grow, providing before you can tangibly even touch her, preparing for her a safe, warm home...and then bringing them into the world. The moment you first see your child, no feeling can beat that overwhelming sense of wonder.
My question is... what woman carries a child for nine months, reads about all of the growing shaping taking place within those months, gives birth to their child and then says God's not real? What?! It's the most amazing transformation and to think that it's all a chance happening. That not one fingerprint in the world matches my daughter's fingerprint!!! God IS REAL, He is ALIVE and He gave ME the MOST amazing gift in the world to take care of. Because in the end, such an amazing gift doesn't belong to me, she belongs to God, but He gave me the honor of caring for her, raising her, teaching her, protecting her, carrying her, allowing her to carry my traits...that's amazing!
Anyways, bunnytrail done. I love her...so much. So Maia, I didn't have enough milk production to feed her the last time for the night last night so we warmed up some breastmilk that I had previously pumped...and she would not have anything to do with the two bottles offered her! I have never heard her throw such a fit. Seriously? It's the same milk, just receiving it differently. Never had a problem with bottles before, until well, last night. Grr. Today she has learned the basic sounds of "ma" and has decided to play with the two sounds all day...so this is what majority of the day sounded like..."maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.....mmmmmmm.....aaaaaaaaaa....... mmmmmmmm ......mmmmmoooom" hahahaha I can't get tired of that :] It was a beautiful sound to my ears! :D
Her newest love is textures and sounds. She loves to hear and feel new things. And playing with toys has become fun now, because although they still make there way to her mouth she likes to look at them first and inspect it, exploring cause and effect. It's amazing watching her grow and take on traits of Jose and I.
I've become obsessed with losing weight...and it manages to occupy my thoughts day and night, I gotta pray for this to pass. It's really not worth this. I don't want to slip into old habits because I am good at giving up. Batteling anorexia or the thoughts of slipping into bad habits is extremely hard. And I encourage anyone reading this...if you are struggling with this or bulimia, there is help out there. Here is a 24-hour Crisis Line 314-588-1683.
Anywhooo, it's getting late, please remember to keep praying for us!
Sonya Boo
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